Live and Prosper

I almost always look at other peoples blogs and go straight to their bio section. The reason for that is I like to get a feel for the persons attitude, drive and beliefs and so on.So, I am hoping this is where you start when reading here.

First, I am a Mother of two boys, teenagers now. One is about to graduate from High School and is currently enrolled in the DEP for the Navy. His brother lives with his Dad in New Mexico and is currently a Junior in High School. I am married to a wonderful man for the past 6 years, but have been together for 11 years. My how time flys! My hubby works for the USPS for the past 10 years and really like it. He is retired Navy himself, and had tested to go into several different government agency’s, and the Post Office called first. Who says their no such thing as destiny. I am not saying it was his destiny to work for the post office….but it did set us up for the things that we would encounter for the next few years.

When me and my husband met, I was working on the Marine Base here in San Diego. He had just retired from the Navy and was working part-time at the exchange. I had been employed at the base for about a year already, but in a different department. My marriage to my first husband had ended, and I moved back home to be near family while going through this difficult time. So, I tell everyone, I was his boss! Which is true. I was the manager of the department , and he caught my eye immeadiately. Because of office politics, we kept our relationship a secret for a whole year. Even while we lived together.

Fast forward a couple of years. My husband remained employed at the post office while I was getting antsy. I jumped from job to job, all the while increasing my pay but also my frustration level. The more comfort I felt in my marriage, the less I felt in my professional life. I had grown to a point with these companies that I was hitting the ceiling. People above me on the totem pole either had to retire or die in order for me to move up. I kept looking for something that I could call a career, not just a job.

I came from the world of retail…so that is problem number 1! Retail management does not pay well at all. So, I began looking across the aisle so to speak and landed a position with Black&Decker tool company. I finally found a place that I knew I could grow in. The company is huge, with the best training available. So, I took to being a super star within my sales category and enjoyed some great recognition.  I excelled at this position for a few years. All the while going on the belief that my Mother had instilled in me -” hard work pays off” motto. Alas, after about 3 years I began to see how the company worked. They favored college graduates over experience, and I was soon training kids to be placed in the position above me. This was okay for awhile. After the 3rd kid quit, and once again I was training someone else to be my Manager, I was not a happy camper. This manager turned out to be not that bad, but it was  still the principle of the matter.

During this time, I was always tired. I thought it was the stress of going through so many managers. I had always pushed myself physically in my jobs. I routinely carried boxes that weighed over 100 lbs, so I was strong and always had been. Many men that I worked along side commented on my work ethic and  strength. As a woman in a predominately male environment, I always worked harder to prove my worth. You almost have to if you are to be respected.

The fatigue was getting to me. I know my body, and something was very wrong. After my work day, I would get into my car and the tears would just start coming. Like I had no control over it. I was in constant pain in my back, and I would fight to stay awake at the wheel on the drive home. Which was no more than 6 miles away. My strength had deteriorated too. I could no longer keep my grip on the boxes at work. I was having pain in my wrists and frequently dropped whatever I was holding at the time. Then my feet started to tingle all the time! You know that needles feeling in your feet when they fall asleep? Like that only intense and never going away. So, I went to see my primary doctor…..

Over the next 4 years, I would see many doctors in different specialties. I started with a Neurologists, Chiropractor, physical therapist and you get the idea. All to no avail. These doctors performed every test out there today on me. But not one of them could tell me what was wrong with me. At least they agreed on one thing, something  was wrong. I was forced to go out on disability because of my therapy. I stayed on state disability for the year they gave me. I resigned my position at Black & Decker, and became very depressed.

The depression was as bad as you would guess. I had always worked. Even when I gave birth to my kids. I started working at the age of 15 and never out of work for more then 8 weeks. Here, I was not only un-employed, but I was sick and nobody could tell me why? I began to give myself a good and long pity-party. I would go into health forums, speaking to other people in the same position as me. Misery loves company. I searched the internet trying to find something that described my same symptoms. Believe me, this is not recommended! I ended up convincing myself I had a brain tumor, or ALS or MS…on and on it went.

I did this for about 3 years. Still not having a diagnosis, still feeling terrible and no relief in sight. My depression was so great, that I would often go days without getting out of bed. Not taking showers or even eating. I eventually attempted to end it all by swallowing a bunch of pain pills that I had accumulated over the past years. Of course, I survived. Even fresh out of the looney bin, I still saw no light at the end of this very long tunnel.

Then one day, I woke up and felt I had to do something! I was responsible for my own fate in this world. I knew I had to get into some sort of action that kept me engaged in this world. I began to focus my attention on my husband and kids. Then I started to ask myself, “what would make you feel like it all matters?” The answer, was start to bring in some money. Something I could do from home, that would not require me to punch a time clock or have someone depend on me being there at a particular time. I needed to be independent of a JOB. I am not a materialistic person, but the financial strain needed to be lifted from my husbands shoulders.

My search started where many searches do, on the internet. I have to tell you, it is overwhelming what is out there. But, I kept looking at these sites that promised riches from home, in less then a year!? I bought into all the hype, I bought ebooks, courses and I was getting so many emails my head was spinning. But, I had a purpose now. That was to learn more about marketing on the internet. I find it funny now, how frustrating it was in the beginning. I mean, I  had no idea how to build a website but I was being told I needed one. I had no idea how to build a list, but really needed one of those too. I dove in, hungry for information, looking for the 1 thing that was going to pull it all together for me.

Fast forward to today. I now know there is not just 1 thing you need to know about internet marketing. There are several variables. And, there is not a one size  fits all business model either. I have learned what I need to do, to be successful in my business. It has to be something I am passionate about. It has to be a real product, that could actually stand alone in the marketplace. Most of all it has to fit with my own mission statement. You see companies post there mission statement all the time.

If you are reading this, and you have had a tough time shoveling through all the crap out there. Let me reassure you something now. It is only crap, if you gain no knowledge from it. Lets say you signed up for a ebook on pay per click marketing. You go through it, really go through it, and you apply none of the strategies. Then you proclaim it is crap, and you got ripped off. I say, if you learned anything at all, then you are all the richer for it. Each peice of material that you use to gain knowledge in your arena of interest, is worth its weight in gold. It comes down to the more you know, the better off you are. It seems simple, and it is. It can become a huge ditch for you to stick your bicycle in, or it can be a launching pad for your success.

I had to do some overhauling on my mind set. I look back at how close I was to losing everything I hold dear in life. I know that my worth is much more then just bringing home a paycheck. I knew I had to try something to keep me actively living life. As I started to engage, I started to want more of it.  And as I was becoming passionate again, more and more positive people entered into my life. And I learn some of the most important lessons from them.

I started this blog to have a platform. A platform to reach others out there that may find themselves in impossible situations. I offer hope and the practical advice of staying engaged. It doesn’t matter if you are seeking to do something online, or offline . Just do it. Stay informed and plan to give back. I was told to make a board of dreams. Put on it whatever I wanted. It could be something physical or  not. This practice is just a simple lesson in being clear about your goals. And then putting a time limit to them. This works in so many ways. And it has keeps  me engaged in my business, my family and my friends.

About 18 months ago, I was finally given a diagnosis. I have Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Along with these I have degenerative condition of my spine. Getting my diagnosis was a huge step in the right direction. Knowing what the symptoms are and how to manage the pain is paramount to my well being. I know my limitations, I rest when I need it. It also allowed me to pinpoint where I wanted to put my energy as far as my life’s work. I now run several support groups and am an active member of the National Fibromyalgia Association.

On my dream board, one of my goals listed is to find and mentor those with disabling conditions to success in life and business.

Future posts will talk about what I do in my business. It is my hope that I can teach others where to start and what to avoid when starting out. I have gone the hard road before you. My experience can help lessen the learning curve when it comes to marketing. If this seems like self serving, then so be it.

I pledge to remain engaged in life, what is your personal pledge? If you are in a state of depression, lost your job recently or just need to know others  are experiencing the same struggles. Please reach out. To me, your family or doctor. Stay engaged in life. Find something that keeps you getting out of bed each and every morning.

All the best to you!

Kathy